In adjustment to accomplish the country safer, U.S. Vice President Dick Chain and a few of his assembly from the orifices of Der Homeland Security are now handing out afterlife sentences for all humans at airports cutting Fox Hats.
According to a ahead concealed branch on page 3,899 of the ahead concealed Patriot Act V, an act that cipher but the President knew about until endure week, airports are the best abode to yield people’s rights due to the affluence with which it can be done.
The country is at war with alarm so all humans cutting hats at an airport or aural 2000 afar of an airport accept to be concluded anon after a trial.
Anyone who has anytime beat a hat will aswell be angry in for termination.
People at airports are already subjected to stimuli that affect their behavior and cede them butterfingers of absolute thinking. From the advance on the senses by the red band of the airline affairs afore even accepting to the airport, to the curve of added people, bare faces, disembodies choir from airy speakers everywhere barking orders about what humans are not accustomed to do at some black acrylic on a curb, and millions of signs acclimation humans to do things or be confined and fined, are all advised to abet in humans a lower accompaniment of alertness area their accuracy shut down and they artlessly do what they are told.
Gradually humans accept become desensitized to airport aggravation and the bondservant mentality isn’t demography authority of humans as easily. And that’s not safe at all so this is a absolute time for the “Hats = Abhorrence law”.
Dick Chain atrociously smirked his angry beam into a camera and said in his best brainwashed puppet-robot voice, “Now that hats according hate, the US will be chargeless of terrorists and anybody will be added autonomous and chargeless and the apple will be a nicer place. Now that we can rid our airports of anyone cutting a hat, the abhorrence will end. Don’t anguish about the missing humans because there will be no added hats to hate. From now on we will use the chat Hword.”
If anyone says annihilation about humans missing due the cutting an Hword, they will be anon dead on the atom by anyone after an Hword.
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